Booger the Cat is Not Amused. (click for more grump)
This is one of those times when the keyboard is a teaspoon, and the blank post window is an empty pool.
Fill 'er up.
Well...
Where do I start?
First, I guess I'll have to apologize for sloppy blogmanship, bad form, and poor etiquette by just walking off, and leaving the blog unattended. No excuses.
Anyway.
I started writing about work some time ago. You see- the idea was to take a look at what work meant to me, to describe a numinous event, and to consider the change that that vision caused in me and my relation to work. It was all going to culminate with a decision I made last spring, and the consequences of having made it.
That was the plan anyway. And the narrative was going to be interspersed with all sorts of fascinating and funny anecdotal slices of life on the summer crew, complete with all the drama one generally comes to expect when the topic at hand drifts around to the cleaning of schools.
None of that shit happened. And, truth to tell, I really don't much feel like drawing out the metaphysical aspects of manual labor, and crafting them into an amusing story, a parable, or a pious admonition to keep your shoulder to the grindstone for the glory of God, or some such thing.
So, for those of you who have given me you time and attention, here's how the story wound up.
I got out of the cardiac event well, but totally broke. I got a spot substituting for the custodial/maintenance/grounds crew at the local school district. That was January of '07. For the last almost three years I have worked hard, and well, and gladly. I made a reputation. I made some friends. This last spring, two full-time jobs became available. After giving it much thought I decided to put in for one of the jobs. One of them is a tough grind of a job, but at 57, I figured I could probably make ten years- well, maybe make ten. It doesn't matter. They did not hire me for either position.
So. There's the wound. I'll spare you all the salt that got rubbed into it.
"It's not what I want, but what God wants for me. Not what I would do, but what God would have me do. Not my will, but that God's be done
That I humbly pray..."
It was no surprise. All summer long I stressed on it- shook the crap out of that inner-magic-8-ball, but the only answers that came up were the various permutations of "Not Yes". Now I'm just glad it's over.
Watch me dodge the part where I say, "Well, here's the lesson in all this..."
A final note:
Rick, I was just over at "Listening Now". I am honored. Durn near speechless. (that's why I typed this out). Thank you very much.
And to Julie, Thanks for the robot link! There's no such thing as a bad day when you have a warrior robot.
Helen (theo) Thanks for the thought, and the link. I checked the site out briefly, read through the introductory stuff. He sounds interesting.
JWM
